The Inbetween

There’s a space between what I see as normal, opposed to what the world sees.

A spectrum of ability.

As I watch my child play, he is a genius.

He can read, spell, do math. He signs his name to his pictures, and memorizes songs on the radio. He has an amazing imagination in a world ruled by technology.

But according to charts and graphs, he is behind.

I fear the day I’ll have to let him go. When he’ll head to school where I can’t explain to everyone his story. Where I can’t protect him from being compared, tested, found wanting.

Sometimes I drop him off at playgroup or the church nursery and he plays well, and other times they have to come get me- “he’s freaking out”, they say. I know they just don’t understand what he’s trying to tell them and he’s frustrated.

I’ve been told he’s bossy, or “he’s REALLY opinionated”.


I tend to blame myself.

I must be a bad parent.

I must be doing something wrong.

He must need someone better.


But, then he tells me I’m his best friend, and I realize I’m doing my best- which is good enough.

I am what HE needs.

He is what I need.

He’s not abnormal, he’s exceptional.

He was born with his cord wrapped twice around his neck. Began having seizures on his second day in this world. With a birth defect that had his brain being compacted for the first 4 months of his life.

When I look at all of the obstacles he’s overcome- I’m amazed!

I just have to change MY way of thinking. Instead of looking at how far he has to go, I need  to take the time to see how far he’s come.

I have to STOP the comparison. Stop trying to make him “normal”.

What’s normal anyway?

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