Letting Go

It’s after midnight and I just got my little guy settled back down in bed.

Tonight the Hubby and I had an impromptu date while our little man spent the evening with his Meemaw and Papaw. It was a great night with lots of laughter and much needed couple time.

When I went to pick up my little guy, he was confused- he wanted to spend the night with his grandparents. He’s been asking about it for awhile, and so has my mom. I want so badly for him to be able to stay there–the only problem?

In his almost 4 years of life, I have not been away from him once (barring his stay at Riley Children’s Hospital his first couple of weeks.)

I go out with friends, or spend evenings with family. We go on dates and stay out late….but we have always brought him back home afterwards. It’s been our routine.

I am a control freak.

I am a Momma of a once critically ill child.

Letting go is hard.

When I think of letting him spread his wings, my throat tightens. My head throbs. The thought of relinquishing control of his well-being is overwhelming, but…

I want to let him experience new things. Some of my fondest memories are from nights I  spent staying with Grandparents, Aunts, Cousins, and friends.

As I was listening to him talk about all the fun he had with his Grandparents, I knew it was time. I have to let him go. I have to let him fly. I have to.

It’s going to hurt me, but it’s going to benefit him. I have to stop imagining that tiny, helpless baby in the hospital and take a long look at the strong, albeit lanky, toddler in front of me.

The one begging me to let him stay with Meemaw, so they can “play in the morning tomorrow.”

It’s time Momma, let him grow.

 

What do you struggle with letting go of when it comes to your little one(s)? I’d love some encouragement and advice!

 

Linking:

Mommy Moments

2 Comments

  1. Amanda Urbancic

    January 21, 2016 at 8:12 am

    I had a hard time at first but finally let go & it is amazing!!! I’ll admit that I sent a thousand texts and requested lots of pictures BUT NOW it’s such a peaceful time with just my hubby. It helps that I know gma can get her to sleep & she loves playing night!! You can do this momma!!!

    1. mrsbishop

      January 21, 2016 at 8:51 am

      I don’t know what I’ll do with a full night of sleep and maybe sleeping in.

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