Loving My Actual Neighbor

*I received Loving My Actual Neighbor from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own. This post may contain affiliate links.*

When I saw that Alexandra Kuykendall had written another book, I knew I HAD to pick it up. Loving My Actual Life was life changing for me. I even have some friends doing a book club using it because of my recommendation. So, when I saw that Loving my Actual Neighbor: 7 Practices to Treasure People Right in Front of You was available, I knew I needed to read it too.

In a world where most of our interaction is done through media channels and online engagement- neighborly communication has majorly diminished over the years. Alexandra Kuykendall wants to change that. She gives us practical steps to become a better neighbor. To our actual neighbors, those in our community, church, and people we see in our day to day lives.

Sometimes that looks like listening. Shutting our mouths and letting others bring their burdens to us. Listening to better understand where they’ve been, who they are.

…”what most of us want is to be understood. To be understood we must be heard. For us to be heard, the person we are talking to must be quiet.”


She also reminds us that sometimes being a good neighbor may feel awkward. That trying new things can make us uncomfortable.

“The more we put ourselves in new, even uncomfortable, situations, the more likely we are to be okay with that feeling. We are then more willing to step into a new and different experience, expecting the familiar awkward.”

As I get older I’ve really been focusing on trying to be a better friend. Especially to those people that I see often. The actual people that live on my street. The families I’ve met at church, the couples in my small group. These are the people that make up our communities and by being a better neighbor to them, we are making where we live a better place!

My favorite part about the book is that at the end she actually includes lists of things we can do to be a better neighbor. Ways to connect with our neighbors. How we can be helpful to our home-bound neighbor. And excuses we can make to get together with those who live around us- I’m mulling over the idea of a block party as we speak, thanks to her advice.

How can you be a better neighbor to the people in your life? I’d love even more practical advice. Share a time when someone was a good neighbor to you- and maybe send them a thank you note. I’m a big fan of the handwritten note.

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